dekedangle_rpfanon | #24 – Not Sure If Serious or Playing Dumba

This is the twenty-fourth post of Deke Dangle RPF Anon, a community for all your ice hockey anon meme needs.

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I didn't see Cooper, but was really disgusted about what Neale said. Come on, lady. We wouldn't get away with that HERE, in this hive of scum and villainy. You work for a major-ish online hockey news outlet!

However, I don't really feel I can say much about it in namespace bc the responses to her (which she's retweeting) are so utterly vile. Way to deflate my outrage, filthy sexist assholes.

ayrt

Honesty my first thought was also that even DEKE wouldn't make acne jokes.

I also was a little bothered by it because we try so hard to make female media members more than their appearance. And then she made it about appearance.

Cooper I guess I just feel like it's a dangerous precedence? Like past history is something we take into account. But it also doesn't make you above the law?? But at the same time maybe I should look at it that way - kind of the opposite of a reputation call?

ayrt

I feel like there's a fundamental difference in the two tweets. Cooper can have all the dumb opinions about hockey that he wants, but by morning there will be a few hundred other opinions on the same topic. What he said is not going to have any direct effect on what DoPS does or doesn't do about the hit.

Whereas Neale's wasn't a hockey opinion. That was just someone making a mean-spirited joke at someone else's expense, and by just tweeting it, the damage is already done.

At least, that's how I feel about it, and why Neale's tweet bothers me but I don't really care about Cooper's.

ayrt

This works for me. Thank you :)

NA

I also feel like the way she's reacting right now is just... childish. Like, congrats, you said a shitty thing (and I stand by my feeling that I would think it was just as shitty if a dude had said it). Stop doubling down, maybe apologize, and then move on with your life instead of spending time retweeting a mix of people who are politely disagreeing with you and people who are being sexist assholes. I'm getting kind of a "I'm not like those other girls, I'm one of the cool girls" vibe from the whole situation, and I can't quite put my finger on why.

da

I think the original tweet was much better left untweeted, but I'm not going to fault anyone's response to the kind of stuff she was getting tweeted at her, whatever that response might be. I'm not going to judge her for being insufficiently detached in the face of sexist slurs and personal attacks.

na

I also was a little bothered by it because we try so hard to make female media members more than their appearance. And then she made it about appearance.

I didn't love the remark (I'm sensitive about acne, too, as someone who was made fun of for it as a teenager and still has a lot of skin problems), but I think it's important to recognize that judging female media members on appearance is fundamentally different from someone, even a media member, making fun of a player's acne. I think a lot of the more moralizing responses she's getting are missing the mark in a similar way. Matt Murray isn't systemically oppressed in any way because of acne, whereas for a female athlete, it would be commented on constantly, and a female media member probably couldn't get a job, at least not where her face would be shown. Hockey twitter fandom makes fun of plenty of guys for their appearance without this kind of response.

That being said, I do think it's a little mean-spirited and not very professional -- neither of which is totally out of line with my impression of Jen Neale anyways.

ayrt

I guess in the end I'm solidly in the "be better" camp. And she absolutely isn't.

And I'm super sorry that people are being dicks to her. But also I don't think other people's (most horrible) response to her comment excuses the original comment.

ayrt

I don't think the horrible responses excuse the original comment, which I said I didn't like either. You're totally within your rights to think she can and should be better. But her making fun of Matt Murray's appearance is not at all equivalent to people judging women on looks because Matt Murray isn't a woman. They are both bad, but bad in different ways and to different degrees. And it's not fair to her to say "we make a big deal about not judging female media members on looks, and yet here is this female media member...". You can't hold her to a higher standard and condemn her mistakes as worse because she is a woman.

ayrt

Oh hey! Apparently I phrased poorly (which isn't surprising because I'm deking while mostly asleep). I absolutely agree with you that it isn't equivalent. I guess I don't know how better to convey my issue with it.

I mean, LBR, is it deke wouldn't or deke can't?

A fair point, this meme's predecessor pretty clearly indicates that deke absolutely would if it weren't a freezable offense.

lmao so true.

I'm inclined towards the latter.

There isn't a functional difference.

... there's a pretty significant difference in motivation and morality, but whatever.

Journalistic ethics and community standards exist to curb behavior. Quibbling over who's heart is in the right place serves no purpose.

................. except "who's heart is in the right place" was LITERALLY what the OP established by saying meme as a whole wouldn't make fun of someone's acne. Journalistic ethics and community standards determine what's acceptable and how transgressions are dealt with, but they can't truly change the morals of people who are operating under its rules. Which is why checks exist in the first place! And it's also why, despite the surface difference in a journalist being able to double-down and a rule-breaking comment immediately getting screened, there isn't really any ground to say that something is so bad even this group of wankers wouldn't say it (which they definitely have on previous occassions)! But, please, feel free to keep making irrelevant peripheral observations.

Especially since literally last post someone complained about seeing the word in a PWP.

#24 – Not Sure If Serious or Playing Dumba

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