#29 – Lay, Lie, or Laine?

[dekedangle_rpf_mod]

This is the twenty-ninth post of Deke Dangle RPF Anon, a community for all your ice hockey anon meme needs.

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Comments

Re: Fic Discussions- and i've just let these little things slip out of my mouth

[(Anonymous)]

http://archiveofourown.org/works/10844172

The Skjei/Vesey everyone's been looking forward to! It's definitely one of the better fics I've read recently, even if it didn't bring me to tears. The smut was hot, and there was just enough 'just buddies, oops, nevermind' angst to make me happy.

Re: Fic Discussions- and i've just let these little things slip out of my mouth

[(Anonymous)]

I'm trying to read it, but it feels so choppy and half-assed.

Re: Fic Discussions- and i've just let these little things slip out of my mouth

[(Anonymous)]

DA
Agreed. And the opening scene is way too over the top and dramatic for my taste.

Re: Fic Discussions- and i've just let these little things slip out of my mouth

[(Anonymous)]

I skimmed it, and definitely agree on the choppy, plus the Ranges ensemble part seemed pulled out of their ass.

Re: Fic Discussions- and i've just let these little things slip out of my mouth

[(Anonymous)]

agreed, i really enjoyed it. even if it made me want to beg the author to accept my beta reading services.

Re: Fic Discussions- and i've just let these little things slip out of my mouth

[(Anonymous)]

I think the author's Greek, if I'm not confusing them with someone else, so I mostly let little grammatical things slide, but there are definitely a few higher level things I would have loved to poke at before it got sent out.

(Same as I wish there was someone to poke at this thing that's been sitting in my folder forever. It's mostly "finished," but I just know something is missing. Beta woes abound.)

Re: Fic Discussions- and i've just let these little things slip out of my mouth

[(Anonymous)]

what's the pairing on yours? i'm willing to take a poke at it if they're people i don't hate (hawks period, and not big on marner particularly marner/matthews either.)

because i'm *trying* to read this one and it is just bugging my inner editor. (i'm also a little "yeah RIGHT" about skjei's offering himself up to practice on, but the choppiness is bothering me more than any characterization issue so far. not very far in yet though, so that could change.)

Re: Fic Discussions- and i've just let these little things slip out of my mouth

[(Anonymous)]

sa

just finished, still want to edit the fuck out of this, and skjei's "oh shit i'm not as straight as i thought i was" epiphany was too understated and came too late in the narrative to suit my tastes.

i couldn't help thinking "jimmy's rebound nick should have been nick leddy" just for the amusement/cross-town rivalry factor, although judging from leddy's usual fic characterization he probably would have been sensible enough to be "hell no i am staying at *least* a borough away from the rookie drama".

Re: Fic Discussions- and i've just let these little things slip out of my mouth

[(Anonymous)]

I liked the Skjei bits, but Vesey's story seemed poorly put together. Honestly, I think you just can't tell this kind of coming out narrative from someone else's point of view - I understood he was supposed to be super scared because that first friend he told was a fucking asshole, but I feel like we didn't really see the progression to Vesey becoming comfortable enough to date some random well enough. And like most coming out narratives, the level of seriousness that Vesey took it with made it impossible for me to buy how cool his teammates were with it. But the smut and Skjei coming to terms with his own feelings did work for me.

Re: Fic Discussions- and i've just let these little things slip out of my mouth

[(Anonymous)]

NA

The first person I came out to was my best friend, who I was pretty sure would be totally supportive, and it was still freaking terrifying. I think different people are going to have different experiences with coming out, and even in an environment where you know people will be cool with it (which would not necessarily be the expectation in hockey), taking that first step can be really hard, depending on your background and circumstances. So that part felt legit to me.

Overall, I really liked it. Good angst, plenty of feelings.

Re: Fic Discussions- and i've just let these little things slip out of my mouth

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT

Oh, yeah, I wasn't trying to discount his fear! I have been fucking terrified before coming out to people, or even not coming out to people but worrying if they can somehow smell it on me or something. I meant that, while that made perfect sense to me, the story itself didn't do a good enough job of showing that in my estimation.

I think I just dislike angst secondhand. This story would have been so much better for me from Vesey's POV.

Re: Fic Discussions- and i've just let these little things slip out of my mouth

[(Anonymous)]

na

I get fear, but Jimmy's paranoia seemed a little OTT at times to me, especially since the threat never played out on screen. It went against Chekov's gun, a bit.

Re: Fic Discussions- and i've just let these little things slip out of my mouth

[(Anonymous)]

Vesey was a bit too ooc for me to fully enjoy it.

Re: Fic Discussions- and i've just let these little things slip out of my mouth

[(Anonymous)]

DA

Agreed. I think this pairing is going to be like Wilson/Latta for me where it took a fan of the team to write a fic I really enjoyed.

Re: Fic Discussions- and i've just let these little things slip out of my mouth

[(Anonymous)]

The one thing that bugged me was how chill Skjei, who considered himself to be completely straight, was with how progressively gay things got. I can understand, kind of, giving a handy to a bro who's freaking out to show that you're supportive. But there was no questions raised either from Vesey or himself about his sexuality at first.