dekedangle_rpfanon | #26 — Vanek! with a Jurco

#26 — Vanek! with a Jurco

This is the twenty-sixth post of Deke Dangle RPF Anon, a community for all your ice hockey anon meme needs.

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Jerkshire was interviewed on SDP the other day and said essentially the same thing (the Pacioretty vs. Subban stuff was management's way of making them both look bad). He rather hilariously, but diplomatically, implied that Pacioretty is too lacking in depth to convincingly lie to the media if he really hated someone and was warring with them behind scenes.

Reading this article reminds me of that. If Therrien had not said something close to that, he'd be all over the media having a meltdown about people making stuff up about him. Instead, not only do we have naive Pacioretty saying he asked him about it and he's convinced his comments were misreported. But it was possible enough that he said it that Pacioretty asked him about it.

My favorite thing about tentacles is the stretch of the very big ones/multiple ones in the same hole and when there are many tentacles involved filling every possible orifice. They should be fucking, deep-throating, and sounding him, all at the same time, possibly while also holding down his arms and legs so that he can't move. Ooh, and maybe wrapped around his throat? I love oviposition too, but honestly mainly for the added extra, impossibly big stretching.

I'm good with human or monster from the deep, but I generally prefer a little creepiness and dub-con involved over complete consentacles, at least initially. And I really, really love if someone else is witnessing it and can't/doesn't want to stop it.

...basically, tentacles give me the possibility to hit my bondage, extreme penetration, humiliation, and dub-con kinks, all at the same time!

Oh, God. I hope my team makes an offer. For either of them. Hey! We have some boring Canadian dudes we could toss Montreal's way.

Carey Price really, really wants that 8th year on his contract, I guess.

Does Montreal need young D? Because Minnesota is in dire need of young centers.

This comment makes me weirdly fond of Pacioretty, lol. I guess it's true that part of liking someone is pity them first.

I didn't see Pacioretty saying he'd asked him about it, but yikes, man. You're right that just by asking he makes it seem more probable that Therrien actually said it.

Maybe that's just when the Lightning is having their event? USA Hockey is saying it's Oct. 8.

http://www.usahockey.com/girlshockeyweekend

Want to play again, fine with league renewal. I do wish we could have one keeper league at some point, because I want to try that, and I like you guys better than anyone else I've played with. But I'm in regardless of whether there's a total redraft or partial.

I'd love to play again with the same leagues. (Go, League C!) Redrafting is fine as well. I liked my team last year, but I agree that it would be unfair to new players if we all kept our best players. And who knows? Maybe I'll get to draft higher this time!

More Panthers: Trocheck, Bjugstad, Rau, Luongo
Mighty Ducks of Anaheim: Selanne, Kariya
Flyers: Briere, Giroux, Simmonds, Gohistebere
Pens: Kessel, Hagelin

...and PK and Carey also in under Habs!

While we're theorizing...I'm beginning to wonder if this means that Therrien has lost the team. Didn't his tenure in Pittsburgh end because the whole team turned against him? I wonder if the way last year played out led to the team leaders criticizing him too vocally, so now they're trying to create a media narrative so Bergevin can clean house for his fox-hole buddy.

I wish there was more Jamie/Tyler fic that wasn't about Tyler getting traded and them becoming absolute besties. It's been three years. I wish there was more stuff that focused on how their relationship could have changed from people who got thrown into the situation of revitalizing their team together while living in one another's pockets to living normal lives and working together while also being friends but not really talking that much in the off season and if Jamie not going out all the time because he got a girlfriend or how much of their friendship is real and how much of it is manufactured by the media.

TLDR: I want to focus more on the bits and pieces we've learned about what's going on right now and less holding onto romanticizing what happened in the past and writing the same story over and over. Not that those stories aren't great, because they are, but there's so much other stuff to write and people just.. Aren't writing it.

i just got into hockey this year and literally learned about Johnny Guadreau in the first Team NA exhibition game and I am so happy that I did.

Sounds like a fic.

http://chicago.suntimes.com/sports/jonathan-toews-lets-his-guard-down-lets-the-world-in/

'Jonathan Toews didn’t become a Buddhist-thinking, Taoism-teaching, Stoicism-preaching, hot-yoga-doing, tiny-dog-toting, self-empowerment-book-devouring, climate-change-battling, urban-gardening, healthy-eating evangelist overnight.'

Unnnnnnngh. In which the media and the world 'discover' that Toews is that earnest guy in the gym who's perfectly responsible wrt gym hygiene and re-racking weights and not creeping in group fitness classes and yet your instincts scream at you to edge away when he tries to initiate conversation about nutrition and/or book club around the water fountain... OH WAIT. We knew this already. Carry on then, JT, carry on. May that MCT oil grease your way to victory!

(Said with ~ mostly ~ fondness, as I do admire the guy as a hockey player, and would like hockey & sports culture in general to be more encouraging of developing good people as opposed to just good players, but the way the press seem to be falling all over themselves to lap the gluten & dairy-free shine off his ass just 'cause he's taken his particular blend of modest exhibitionism + preachiness to twitter & insta like he's the next coming of [insert relevant prophet here] makes me cringe)

Yes. Because McJesus.

I just think the whole thing is freaking hilarious. I wish I hadn't been turned so thoroughly off the Hawks, because otherwise Toews being ridiculous hippie health nut (the Gwyneth Paltrow of hockey, as someone on my TL said) seems like a fun characterization to play with.

If there's one thing I find frustrating about hockey rpf fandom in general, it's the tendency to find The Story for a pairing and write 20-1000 versions of it, depending on the popularity of said pairing.

The fact that they didn't get Cooper as head coach is mind-boggling. Except, you know, McJesus.

That's true of most fandoms though, no?

C!N

Thanks! Yay! Thank you for your feedback, it is duly noted!

Awesome! I believe you're the 5th GM nonnie who is into returning (I'm trying to keep a rough count here--the actual count will come when I send out the renewal notices, but this is helpful for now). Thanks so much for chiming in!

C!N

Heh, I know that feeling. Given the nature of hockey, a ton of roster moves are inevitable, whether due to injury, slumps, or new hotness breaking out that you simply must have on your team. That's part of the fun! ;)

I have you down as #6 for returning.

I appreciate the feedback on scoring categories, and I do want us to discuss whether to add/subtract/change our categories. As always, I am open to the will of the leagues and GMs.

I'm going to post links to the primers/tips/scoring categories discussions so everyone can weigh in with refreshed memories (or new knowledge if they didn't read them before or learned new things by playing last season).

C!N

You are lucky #7! I'm glad you want to play again, and I appreciate the input!

C!N

One more for returning! #8! Thank you! :)

I, too, am sort of curious about how keeper leagues work and would like to participate in one sometime. Unfortunately, I don't quite know how that would work with our 3 leagues. Making one league for all the people into the keeper concept is the only way I can think of, but if someone from a different league wanted to join it, they wouldn't be able to import their keeper players.

I mean, if all the players from, say, League B decided they wanted to do a keeper thing, we could try it, but the one or two players from A or C who might want to would be out of luck. (I guess the people from B who wanted to do a full redraft might be able to switch to A or C, but that might leave us very unbalanced.)

If someone else wants to start a separate league with the intent of turning it into a keeper league next season and beyond, that is totally fine with me. Unfortunately, my extremely limited time for this currently would not allow me to do it.

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#26 — Vanek! with a Jurco

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