#11 - Kopitar Prefers Amps That Go to Eleven

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This is the eleventh post of Deke Dangle RPF Anon, a community for all your ice hockey anon meme needs.

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Comments

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

No no no, even better, the baby is born on American soil because the Canadian border control guys are suspicious of their haste

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

I think all it would take would be for the pregnant NHL star to explain the reason that the baby can't be born in U.S., and most Canadian border guards are going to carry them across if need be.

"I'm not gonn be the reason Baby Toews (or Crosby or whoever) might play for the U.S. someday!"

More likely they get slowed down when they get a speeding ticket before getting to the border.

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

ayrt

yes, okay. So the baby is born like a meter from the border and then the Canadian border guards enter into a conspiracy with the NHL star to lie about where the baby was born. "IT WAS TOTALLY ON THE CANADA SIDE OF THE LINE WE SWEAR"

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT

Yes, they roll the broken-down car (where Canadian dude has just given birth in back seat) across the border and swear it was there the whole time.

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

And fifteen years or so later (whenever they start looking around for U17s or whatever the youngest international team is) it turns out they forgot to kill *all* the cameras or whatever security measures they have at the Canada/US border so there's hard-to-refute proof that yeah, baby whoever really *can* play for the US if they want to and there's also something of a scandal.

I would also read this where the conspiracy *does* work, I just want to see the potential mess if it does for a while but doesn't forever. Especially if the kid grew up going to US schools, has friends in the USNTDP program, and says "fuck it, Dad (or Dads), *you're* Captain Canada not me" and puts a pic of themselves in US team gear up on whatever kind of social media we have then. (The chaos would be probably be even greater if the other father is European and their country's rules for hockey citizenship would allow the kid to choose their team.)

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

NA

Not trying to discourage this entire thread from ever coming up a fic with this storyline (because I would totally read it) but I'm honestly curious, if a baby is born on United States soil to parents who are Canadians, would that automatically qualify the child for dual-citizenship?

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

NA

I'm guessing nonnies are having the players try to remove the option of choosing from these hypothetical hockey anchor babies. ;)

If the kid is born in Canada to Canadian parents, no possibility the kid could choose to play for Team USA in the future.

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

ayrt

Ah, okay that makes sense! I was a little confused about why they would be so insistent on having the baby born in Canada when they'd still eligible for Canadian citizenship even if they're born on US land!

This makes me interested in reading a fic where a multinational hockey couple somehow end up giving birth to their kids in two different countries and their children end up playing against each other on different national teams one day.

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

Which is not true, anyway. The child could still move to the US as an 18-year old, apply for citizenship and then play for Team USA. Also, correct me if I'm wrong, but citizenship only matters when you're *changing* who you play for in international competition. If you've never played for anyone, you could play for whatever country will let you, right?

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

Applying for citizenship in the USA is not nearly as simple and quick as you're making it sound.

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah, unless Donald Trump gets his way:

"If you meet certain requirements, you may become a U.S. citizen either at birth or after birth.

To become a citizen at birth, you must:

Have been born in the United States or certain territories or outlying possessions of the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction of the United States;
OR
had a parent or parents who were citizens at the time of your birth (if you were born abroad) and meet other requirements"

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

If you're born in the US, you're an American citizen, with one very minor exception (child of foreign diplomats, iirc). I'm not sure how Canadian citizenship and having a dual passport works for them.

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

I just googled it and you're technically a Canadian citizen too if 'you were born outside Canada after April 17, 2009, and at least one of your parents was born in Canada'

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

Anyone born on US soil is automatically a US citizen. And googling tells me that anyone born outside of Canada whose parents are Canadian citizens were born on Canadian soil is automatically a Canadian citizen, but they are not a Canadian citizen if their parent was a Canadian citizen who was born outside Canada? I think. That is very weird and confusing, Canada.

Also, could conceivably have an effect on third generation NHLers.

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

The Canadian government's website states you're a citizen if 'you were born outside Canada after April 17, 2009, and at least one of your parents was naturalized in Canada before your birth' so even if their parents were Canadian citizens who were born outside of Canada, I think they still count!

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

That's not confusing, that's just a grandparent rule. You're not Canadian just because both sets of your grandparents were Canadian, although your parents are.

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

I'm wondering if it works that way in the US, but I doubt it since it would be a mess. There are probably residency requirements, but that could potentially deny a lot of rightful people citizenship.

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

I'd imagine that, even if the child of an NHLer who was born in the US was not automatically a Canadian citizen because that NHLer was also born in the US when their parent played in the NHL, it'd still be pretty easy to get that kid Canadian citizenship.

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

The US technically doesn't have "dual" citizenship, but you can have citizenship from another country without losing your US citizenship (with one exception that's not relevant to this discussion). You're required to use a US passport when entering or exiting the country, though.

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

most Canadian border guards are going to carry them across if need be.

I'm laughing so hard at the image of the Canadian border guards abandoning their posts en masse to bear Sidney Crosby over the border so his child will have no option to play for team USA.

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

NA

Yeah this is my favorite image of the day. Meanwhile there's an insanely long line of cars waiting to cross the border because all of the posts are abandoned to carry Sid across.

If this had happened while Mike Richards was crossing the border, maybe it would've given him time to rethink and toss his stash. So it's good for everyone involved.

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

I still want the fic where Mike's border trouble is cover for going into witness protection and Jeff has to track him down. Also, wasn't Jeff pregnant, and that's why he needed to speak to Mike so urgently? Maybe there's a way to combine the two scenarios. Maybe Mike's the pregnant one and he witnessed whatever while hastily trying to get over the border.

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

I'm pretty sure Mike was the pregnant one (and IIRC the biological father is the reason Mike's in witness protection--he saw *something* he wasn't supposed to. Which could be related to "an incident at the border" somehow, but it's going to take somebody who can actually plot to figure out how).

Obviously Carts is going to end up being the kid's other dad for all intents and purposes once he finds Mike, I just think this scenario should be milked for as many Harlequin points as possible and making the biodad evil amuses me.

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

I just want this notfic to have a postscript that, after all of this, Sid's kid grows up to be an accountant who spent his teenage years saying "fuck you dad, I hate sports!" and forming a band for whatever the 2030s style of angry music is.

Re: Player Lives and Random Gossip

[(Anonymous)]

+1 You got me laughing, nonnie.