#24 – Not Sure If Serious or Playing Dumba

[dekedangle_rpf_mod]

This is the twenty-fourth post of Deke Dangle RPF Anon, a community for all your ice hockey anon meme needs.

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Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

For the stuff that doesn't fit anywhere else.

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

I just found an imgur album of a woman cheerfully getting gangbanged by a Slovakian hockey team (I think, their jerseys say Bratislava, anyway) that looks very amateur and thus pretty legit, and now I just want this scenario but with a dude instead.

https://imgur.com/a/sNutm (so incredibly NSFW)

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

Zdeno Chara should get gangbanged by a hockey team imo. Slovakian or Bostonian, I'm here for all of it.

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

The posing for pictures before the sexing was hilarious. My favorite was the one with the guy skating by and stopping like 'oh hey, a naked lady, that's odd.'

Then comes the shower scenes and all I can focus on is the fact that everyone is wearing shoes but letting other parts of their naked bodies touch the shower floor. Oh yes, don't get athlete's foot, get it all up in your most delicate areas instead. That's much better.

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

A bunch of the Blues dads (Brouwer, Stastny, Ott, and Backes) took their babies to swim lessons. Awww: https://www.instagram.com/p/BFWuICHFNNB/

(I always manage to forget how many Blues babies there are, but there are so many. And yet the worst dad humor offenders on the team have yet to have kids...)

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

I'm not sure this is really of interest to anyone here, but it made me pretty emotional so I thought I'd share and it's always nice to broaden your horizons on foreign hockey drama, right?

There is (now "there was"...) this German hockey club playing in the DEL (highest league) called Hamburg Freezers (Jamie Benn played for them during the lockout, I think?) and 5 days before the application deadline for a new DEL licence the owners (AEG who also own, among others, the LA Kings and the Eisbären Berlin) said "nope they cost too much" and said they wouldn't apply for a new licence (which costs €800,000). They really didn't tell anyone before (not staff or players) and already sold season tickets for 16/17 etc. :/

The captain of the Freezers (Christoph Schubert, he used to play in the NHL) tried to save the club basically all by himself (with help from others though, for example a field hockey player who won olympic gold and some footballers, I think?) and managed to raise almost 1 million euros in 5 days, but the owners still didn't even want to apply for a new licence for even one year to buy some time for them to find a new owner or sponsors. So now the club just closes and the players don't have a club anymore at the moment and the staff are all out of a job. :(

Here are two articles with more info (the only ones I could find in English with my German google, lol):

http://www.dw.com/en/captain-schubert-fights-to-save-freezers-ice-hockey-team/a-19277269

http://www.dw.com/en/bid-to-save-hamburg-freezers-del-ice-hockey-team-comes-up-short/a-19281624

I didn't even like the Freezers much, but this is still so sad to me after having followed their efforts over the last week. :(

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

Just saw this linked on reddit:

https://www.reddit.com/r/hockey/comments/4kzzq5/wayback_wednesday_miracle_maid_the_strange_life/

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

I interviewed for a job with my team today! Not sure how it went but it was fun nonetheless :)

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

Well, this is delightful

https://twitter.com/NHLonNBCSports/status/735625719565279232

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

The last name change question and the answers to it reminded me that there are media guides published by the teams before every season and before the playoffs. (Someone mentioned pronunciations and this stuff is where I've learned most of them.)

See, as examples:
http://predators.nhl.com/v2/ext/01_2015-16_Files/NSH_Media_Guide_2015-16.pdf
and
http://predators.nhl.com/v2/ext/01_2015-16_Files/2016_Playoff%20Media%20Guide.pdf

They're gigantic info dumps with literally everything you would want to know about a team and its players. Most of the pages are taken up by an exhaustive team history - like their franchise records playing in other arenas, etc. Milestones and records for miles and miles too.

But they also have profiles for their players, mostly hockey-related except for stuff like this -

Roman Josi's Background section:
Nickname “Yos”… Favorites include Rolf and Daughters (Nashville restaurant), Open by Andre Agassi (book), Steve Aoki (musician), Ibiza (vacation destination)… Enjoys playing tennis and would like to be an “oldies tennis pro” after his hockey career is completed… Considers being dropped into the ocean at night to be his greatest fear, and drinking chocolate milk to be his guilty pleasure… Adam Sandler would be his choice to play him in a movie.

(By the way, not all teams have them available on their site, so some nonnies might be disappointed trying to Google-fu them.)

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

This is so not related to hockey, but the Puck Soup podcast from yesterday where a hungry, loopy Dave Lozo lists all the reasons he thinks Bucky Barns and Captain America are perfect for each other really made my whole afternoon. I'm glad that I'm more aware of him now, I like his writing/twitter/podcasting.

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

Can the first person original character fics stop? Or just the original character fics. They aren't even well written.

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

A tweet from Vlasic:

In recognition of the Blues having a great season, I donated 2500$ to the David and Kelly Backes charity @A4A_org #donateifyoucan

Well, I was already planning to root for the Sharks, but as a Blues fan this has me 500% more on board.

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

Ivan Provorov was named best defenseman of the year in the CHL!

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

I just read a Yotes fic where the author was very upset with Boedker and said so in her author's note. Does anyone know what the context of this might be? Something that happened after he went to the Avs?

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

Who could Matthews potentially be shipped with on the Leafs? Marner?

Re: Random Hockey Thread - Crossovers

[(Anonymous)]

Putting this here because it's a bit Venting, a bit Fic You Want (but not player specific like the existing thread).

So, I'm going through the Generation Kill tag looking for things to read until some hockey WIPs are done, and I find a GK/hockey crossover--OMGYAY!!!!---but then it has characters I hate and is really tiny short--FUCKING...BOOOOO!!! Man, that's so frustrating. Why did it have to be those particular Hawks players? Fuck me. /vent

It reminded me how I would give up a tooth for a good long plotty hockey crossover with another fandom I also love. Generation Kill would be amazing, but I'd also take something like Person of Interest, Justified, Leverage, Teen Wolf (but not one that makes Derek a human figure skater ffs), Bond/Bourne/anything to do with spies, or basically anything that's action oriented and has nothing to do with coffee or college students. Or the Hell's Kitchen portion of the MCU--Luke Cage should totally have taken up hockey, think about it. Jessica Jones investigating something involving the NHL would be incredibly entertaining. Matt Murdock dating/having a one night stand with a player who is taken aback that a lawyer has more scars and bruises than he does.

Oh and more crossovers with other RPF would be awesome. That one where Jeff Carter fucks that pop star and neither knows that the other is famous is gold. More like that, please fandom?

So yeah, this fandom could use more crossovers. If I could write fic, I'd probably write nothing but crossovers and it'd become annoying to everyone checking the tag. LOL *shrug emoticon*

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

https://twitter.com/SanJoseSharks/status/737066257933991936

Thornton's new cat loves putting her paws in his beard. (he mentions it just at the end)

So cute, I would love to see a video of that.

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

I can't get over how weird it is that the two Kelly Cup finalists are the ECHL affiliates of the two Stanley cup finalists. It seems like an embarrassment of riches for the Sharks and the Pens. They are both doing well now and their future looks pretty rosy, also.

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

This #fakestanleycupfacts on twitter is kind of hilarious

https://twitter.com/hashtag/fakestanleycupfacts?f=tweets&vertical=default&src=tren

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

Wow, The Pens Blog is salty about a whole bunch of things, most of which IDGAF about, but also they claim Pensburgh is ripping off their analysis, which I can only assume means they don't read what Pensburgh writes.
http://thepensblog.com/2015-archives/finals-shows-content-curation-at-its-worst.html

TPB is such a shithole. Jesse Marshall and Meesh, you're such interesting writers and seem like decent people. (Meesh does, at least; Jesse might be casually gross and I just haven't noticed.) Why are you there? :(

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

Geno's most recent "like" on Twitter is a picture of a guy getting pegged and kissing a guy who's fucking a girl. I don't even know how to deal with this.

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

https://streamable.com/sahz

Jagr pole dancing with a hockey stick - badly.

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

So I saw this video linked in the Sin Bin but not over here. So for any nonnies who don't happen to visit over there, enjoy Jagr strip teasing on his hockey stick to Avril Lavigne.

https://www.facebook.com/68Jagr/videos/1067547963322035/

Re: Random Hockey Thread

[(Anonymous)]

http://thesinbin.dreamwidth.org/3790.html?thread=4481486#cmt4481486

Does anyone remember that story of where he met the gay couple on the plane back from Paris and they told him they got married on Consol ice and he thought that was so cool?

What? When did this happen?